Not The BBC News: 8 August

A pro-choice American professor has said that he expects Roe v. Wade to be struck down from American law. Roe v Wade permitted abortion up to the point where the child was “viable” outside the womb (originally 28 weeks’ gestation, now 24 weeks); he expects this to change to “when the foetus/baby can feel pain” (no later than 20 weeks). Beth Tweddle, Britain’s most successful female gymnast, has retired from competitive gymnastics at the age of 28. A man from West Siberia has been charged with stealing an entire road; the 82 reinforced concrete slabs were valued at about $6,000. England won the Ashes cricket series against Australia with the help of a local shower — several showers, in fact, as most of the last day of the decisive match was rained off, leading to a draw. A UK government consultation document on making it easier to turn redundant shops, barns and stables into housing has been publicised as “an acceptance that Internet shopping has killed the high street”. Alex Rodriguez, the highest paid player in US baseball, has been banned for a year and a half for his involvement with a drug clinic. New draft legislation will ban companies from using premium rate phone numbers for customer service calls – though the legislation doesn’t cover Government departments such as Citizens Advice, who have been campaigning for this change but have an 0845 telephone number themselves. The actor Peter Capaldi, who played a gormless oil company employee in the film Local Hero (a film that prominently featured a telephone box), has been unveiled as the new face of Doctor Who. And finally, a team at the University of Edinburgh programmed a computer to generate jokes depending on unexpected similes, and discovered that the majority of the jokes produced were sexist; for example, “I like my women like I like my computers ... with a sensitive touch pad”.